4th of July you dirty whore

So for some reason the 4th of July, which is totally awesome as a holiday/birthday/ reason to buy your kid a flag t-shirt without feeling like a redneck even though you kind of are a little bit white trash inside, has become a internet blogger make-something-ridiculous-out-of-a-flag-motif DIY pinterest EVENT TO END ALL EVENTS.

Well this is adorable and totally not-possible for a normal person.

Remember this ? Of course you don't (which, yes, I pinned, dammit!)?

Ooooooooor hows about thiiiis? Yeah, I'm right on that.

But, I do feel like this would be good for a (me) great big fat person for the 4th.

Bluuuughhhhs. What just happend? Flag tac-o salad. Thats what.

Oh, here we go, this just screams I JUST SMOKED CRAAAAAACK FLAVORED PATRIOTISM.

...and don't worry, we didn't forget you mason jars!

But wait, there is more.

I just found the most ridiculous  *

(mic drop)

I'm out.

* Guess what my favorite part of this blog is? Shilling for I CAN'T BELIEVE IT'S NOT BUTTER is just shameful.